Celebrate Your Worth

What started off as a post on celebrating who you are has slowly but surely morphed into a mini-series about self-confidence and identity. Today I’m excited to bring my good blogging (and real life friend!) to Hugs and Lattes to talk about celebrating your self-worth. Tiffany is no stranger to Hugs and Lattes; she’s posted here several times before and even collaborated with me on one of my favorite posts to date. She blogs at Endless Bliss and she just got back from traveling the Caribbean as a Carnival cruise employee!

Celebrate your Worth

Hi friends! I’m Tiffany, a chaser of happiness and a lover of wine with a thirst for adventure. When I’m not tucked away in a tiny cabin working at sea, I’m sharing my life experiences on my little corner of the internet, Endless Bliss.

Endless Bliss

Christina is not only one of my favorite bloggers, she’s also one of my longest running blog friends. She’s constantly inspiring me, so any blog venture or project she begins or gets behind, I’m always onboard, and this one is one of my favorites. I’m a big believer in celebrating all moments of your life, but I’m an even bigger believer in celebrating who you are. You became the person you are today because of everything you’ve been through – the good, the bad and the ugly – and you need to celebrate every part of you and your life because all of the places you’ve been, the people you’ve met, the experiences you’ve had, those are what brought you to where you are, right here in this moment, reading this blog post.

Something I’ve always struggled with is my identity. I’m constantly trying to figure out new ways to learn things about myself and my behaviors and why I think or act a certain way in different situations. I never stop questioning myself, which has been both a blessing and a burden.

Awhile back, my friends and I were talking about this guy who had a crush on me. I said something about how I was surprised about it because we are both so different in almost every aspect. One of my friends said she believed that one of the reasons he was attracted to me was because I already know who I am. This immediately gave me pause. I thought it was ironic because I feel like my 20’s have been a never-ending journey to try to figure myself out. Here I am thinking that I need to find myself when the people around me believe that my self-discovery journey is one that has already been complete. It was interesting to me that my inner battle and struggle with finding myself didn’t resonate with the people around me.

I think one thing that coincides with knowing yourself is knowing your worth, and this has probably been the biggest struggle for me throughout my entire life. In the past, I’ve been described as a doormat. People think I’m too nice. I rarely ever say ‘no.’ I suck at confrontation, and I’d rather avoid conflict than risk angering someone. Since I’ve been in my 20’s I’ve been able to better find my voice, and if something makes me extremely uncomfortable, I won’t hesitate to say so, but at the same time, I’m a people-pleaser, and I’ll be the first to admit that about myself. I want everyone to like me, and I hate leaving arguments or small tiffs open-ended.

I’m the kind of person that will give people compliments all day, but when someone says something nice about me, I deny it before thanking them.

I’m the kind of person that will give a friend advice, and if they were to repeat the same advice back to me, I wouldn’t be able to follow it.

I’m the kind of person who has an argument with someone and will almost immediately take fault in fear of them hating me if I continue to argue.

I’m the kind of person who will exhaust myself trying to meet the needs of others while forgetting my own needs in the process.

I’m beginning to realize how toxic these behaviors are. I’ve noticed that I let others dictate the way I feel about myself. I listen and watch for reactions to the things I do or say. I’m constantly seeking approval. I’ve allowed people to treat me poorly, resulting in a loss of confidence and the constant questioning of ‘What can I do to make them like me?’ I let my self-esteem and self-worth deteriorate because of my hunger for the attention of people who couldn’t see my worth. It would be so easy to blame others, but the only person at fault is myself. As the saying goes, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent,” and truth be told, I allowed people to invade my brain and ultimately make me forget what I deserve and what I’m worth.

When it comes to love, whether it’s romantic, friendly or self-love, you should never settle:
Find a partner who shows that they love you through both their words and actions. Think of this quote: “We accept the love we think deserve.” Never settle for anything less than butterflies, stolen kisses, sweet surprises, inside jokes and true love.

Spend time with friends who make you smile so much that your cheeks hurt. Identify the friends who add more good things to your life than bad. Be friends with the people who will answer your call at 2 in the morning because someone broke your heart. Be friends with the people who will drive hours to come get you when your tire blew out. Be friends with the people who are happy for you when you get good news rather than being jealous or hateful. Be friends with the people who expect nothing from you apart from good conversation, a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on and maybe a little wine. Surround yourself with people who will remind you of your worth when you’ve temporarily forgotten.

Be able to look at yourself in the mirror and truly love the person staring back at you. Remember: you decide your own happiness. Waiting for other people to make you happy is the easiest way to be unhappy.

Rid yourself of the people who cause you distress and bring you down. Life is way too short to spend your time being anything less than happy. Never forget that you are the determinant of your worth, and in the slightly altered words of Fifth Harmony, “Baby [you’re] worth it.”

Endless Bliss

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