Here is my working thesis on life:
Relationships are hard, and I strongly advise against them. Relationships are not for the faint hearted; they require work and tears. In contrast, a life of chosen loneliness is easy. While this also requires tears in the beginning, tears eventually turn into a hardened heart. Bitterness takes root, and grows in the soul until emotions have died and there is nothing there but a shell.
With tears comes joy, but a shell is empty. 
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Things I Would Rather Do than Write my Paper

Explicate rap lyrics:
Hurricane Chris: Halle Berry

Call her Halle Berry, Halle Berry
Halle Berry, Halle Berry
She walk it like a model 
Hands on her knees
Scrub the ground
She ain’t nothing but a tease
Halle Berry, Halle Berry
Halle Berry, Halle Berry
Hurricane Chris is at the club with his gangsta homies, and sees a girl who is quite attractive. She looks like Halle Berry. She evidently has model quality, but she also has that ghetto booty those poor, starving models don’t have. I’m not sure why she scrubs the ground, it must be some new dance move I’ve yet to find. (Off to the club I go. However, I probably shouldn’t do this dance because it seems to be a teasing move. I don’t want to tease them poor, broke college boys.)
 However, this girl teases Hurricane Chris by scrubbing the ground. MAYBE she’s really good at cleaning. It’s teasing him cause his house is filthy dirty from all those parties he has because, you know, he used to be famous. So everyone like, totally wants to get wasted at Hurricane Chris’s house. But this Halle Berry dancing chick won’t go home with him to clean his floors. Such a shame. 
So yeah. It’s all about this girl who looks like and dances like Halle Berry. I think. 
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Paper Writing Break

I’m only 2 1/2 pages from finishing my 8-10 page paper about Ophelia and Lady Macbeth’s descent into madness. I’m exhausted. I’m done writing papers. I’ve only done a page and a half today. So it’s not like I’ve been writing 6 pages all in one sitting. But I still have so much more to do. It is this point when I am over school.
Done with it.
Ready to lay out somewhere at a beach.
I really want a beach.
And the hot sun.
A big floppy hat.
A bikini bod.
And tan skin. I’d like tan skin if that is at all possible.
Summer come soon!!!!!
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Heartache

My heart is very heavy for all the destruction that has happened this week. For the first time in my life, I  am desperately thinking “Jesus, come soon!” This week harbors so much heartache for so many families. What is God trying to tell us? Is he trying to get our attention? Maybe he is. But why do so many families have to suffer?
I am wrestling with so many thoughts about suffering and God. I know he is Sovereign. I know He holds the world in His hands. But why did he allow an 8 year old boy to die because he was waiting on his dad to cross the finish line? What did that 8 year old boy do? Why did he allow families in Texas lose loved ones because of another explosion? People are injured or dead because their crime was living too close to a fertilizing plant. Two explosions in one week. Then there is torrential flooding up in the mid-west. What is going on??? Why is America going through so much hell?
Why did someone or a group of someones think it was okay to ruin an innocent sport with bombs? This isn’t Mario Kart. No one was just hit off course then their figure flickered on the screen and they were back racing again. I am absolutely heart broken and heart sick. 
And for the first time in my life, I am beyond angry at circumstances in the world over which I have no control. I am heart sick for those who are suffering this week. And all I can do is ask God “why” and repeatedly ask him to hold those families close to His heart. I don’t even want to say this is all a part of His plan. I don’t think God planned for this to happen. But I still don’t know why it happened. 
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